Community Leadership and Gangs

Community leadership is:

1. Investigation – Knowing what the burning issues are, or the “community cry”, as I like to call it. This can be determined by surveys, focus groups and town hall meetings where the public is engaged to address local concerns that are directly affecting their quality of life.
2. Involvement – Community leadership need not be a “top down” structure. In fact, it is usually more effective when it is led by grassroots, or “bottom-up” leadership that comes from the unelected, un-bureaucratic strings that slow the process for taking action.
3. Investment – While it is true that something can be done about issues with little or no money, a lot more can be accomplished when those entities who control the community purse strings invest in the development of committees, strategic plans, and employees to implement the plans developed. This includes investors from both the public and private sectors of the community. The more private money the better, as, again, it usually does not come with all the strings that hinder and limit needed action.
4. Influence – Once the issues have been identified, plans have been discussed openly with any and all concerned and investors have been secured to hire employees to implement the plan, a campaign is needed to raise awareness, recruit volunteers and educate the constituents about the purpose, goals and objectives of the action plan to sustain it until the goals are achieved.

Using the above principles, my intention here is to raise awareness and focus the attention of community leadership on the local youth street gangs. The first principle of “Investigation” has been accomplished by many communities and does not need further elaboration here, except to say that those who decide to be involved with the gang issues should remain students, keeping up with all the changing data regarding gangs. As one writer put it, “if there is any constant in today’s gangs…it is their changing forms…”

Youth violence and street gangs continue to be a concern for many communities across the country. According to the National Gang Threat Assessment 2009, law enforcement now estimates there to be one million gang members in America! This is a substantial increase from the estimate of 760,000 in 2006. No one seems to be quite sure if the reason for the increase is because of an actual increase of youth joining gangs, more communities paying more attention to, or finally acknowledging their gang problem, or simply a faulty methodology for collecting accurate gang membership data. My guess is that it is some combination of all of the above.

For many communities, this “old problem” for others, is a new problem for them and they are searching for answers. Unfortunately, there are not a lot of answers to be found and it is more about learning what not to do, than what to do, that has been tried unsuccessfully by other communities. Most community’s first order of business has been to involve law enforcement. That is understandable given the crime associated with gangs. However, new gang communities should also learn that over time, law enforcement is not a solution to the gang problem, but only a normal and necessary reaction to the gang problem. In other words, if a crime is committed by any person or group of people, we expect law enforcement to react and do their work accordingly. But the problem does not end there, nor should it be expected to any more than chopping off weeds at the surface should be expected to end the problem of the weeds growing back. Nevertheless, many communities continue to go down this well trodden road of heavy suppression tactics to solve the gang problem.  While suppression can provide a temporary “quick fix”, that gives our “front lawn” a neat and orderly appearance for awhile, in due season, the weeds grow right back.

The Roots of the Issue

Gangs exist for a reason. Youth are drawn to this destructive lifestyle for a reason. We may not like, agree with, or accept their reasoning, but gangs continue to exist and grow regardless, and that alone should cause us to step back and think more deeply about this gang phenomenon that continues to allude a solution. This is why I use the metaphor of “weeds”, because, like gangs, we have never been able to solve the weed problem and have come to simply accept it as a fact of life, rather than a problem that can be solved. Yes, we can solve it better in some places than others. We can replace real grass with astro-turf and rid ourselves of having to deal with the problem. But that solution is artificial and comes at the expense of giving up enjoying the nature of the real deal. In any case, in the end, weeds exist, will continue to exist and in some places thrive, due to environments beyond our ability to control. Unfortunately, the same can be said about gangs. As the professor of criminal justice at the University of Illinois, Chicago, author, and gang expert John Hagedorn says: “today’s gangs are not going away soon, no matter what we do.”

As I have studied, watched and been actively involved with the gang issue over the years, I suggest, that communities should view gangs, like weeds, as a fact of life, and not as a problem they can get rid of. I know that sounds pessimistic or maybe even cynical, but that is not my intention. My intention is to be realistic. Realistic about how feasible it is for communities to expect to put an end to the gang problem, when they can’t even solve its root causes:

1. Poverty – Statistics show that wherever there is poverty, there will be a high probability of gang spawning. The U.S. government declared a “war on poverty” decades ago, but we are not any closer to solving the problem of poverty. According to the United Nations, nearly one billion people live in slums, 12 million in the U.S. alone. And by 2020, the UN predicts that half of the world’s urban population will live in poverty.
2. Drugs – UN studies show that illegal drugs are a $400 billion global business equaling 8% of the global economy. And Professor Hagedorn tells us that, “In Chicago, like elsewhere in the United States, cocaine transformed gangs into economic enterprises”. Accordingly, drugs are a major motivator and a strong tool of recruitment for youth to join gangs and make quick cash.
3. Racism – Aside from the “normal” race issues our country has battled before and after the civil rights movement, racism has become a factor amongst the gang sub-culture, according to recent revelations from interviews and court documents with Mexican Mafia gang members and associates. Prison gangs are divided by race. Prison gangs continue to have influence over many local street gangs. According to the record, many seemingly “senseless” murders have been part of a Mexican Mafia ethnic cleansing initiative begun in the 1990’s.
4. Broken Families – The 50% divorce rate of married couples in America has been known for many years. In addition, we have also exposed many of the family secrets of abuse and neglect children suffer at the hands of their parents/guardians behind closed doors. Today, we are dealing with the attempt to re-define the nuclear family and the institution of marriage, which will certainly carry its own consequences (unintended or not). The bottom line is the effect all these things combined will have on the future health and happiness of our children and their children. By their own admission, an unhealthy home life is one of, if not the main reason, why youth join gangs in the first place.

Given the above root causes for creating gangs (and other negative lifestyles); I suggest being realistic is an important factor in determining community strategy. Approaching a problem to get rid of is a different mentality than approaching a fact of life. We all hope that the scourges of poverty, drug addiction, racism and dysfunctional families would disappear. Nevertheless, we have all had to learn to live with these things, and in many cases have been victims touched personally by one, two or all of the above.

Choosing Your Battlefield

By being realistic I do not mean to suggest giving in or giving up just because these facts of life are in our midst. Even Jesus said, “the poor you will always have with you”, but He did not mean to imply that we should do nothing about it, but simply to recognize it as something to acknowledge and deal with correctly, fairly, justly, reasonably. Thus, each community must do the same regarding gangs. It means that we shift our focus from the problems gangs create, to the problems that create gangs. We know what to do about the problems gangs create. That is the job of law enforcement. It is the root causes outlined above that communities often choose to neglect or acknowledge as battlefields that need more of our time, energy and resources.

I have no doubt your community has many fine leaders (perhaps you are one) and community organizations already in the trenches dealing with all of the root issues I mentioned and more. And if by chance you are not already involved, I pray this article has stirred something deep within you to cause you to consider joining the battle for the safety of your neighborhood or community with your family, friends and colleagues. Because the fact is, we are responsible for the quality of life in our community more so than the police or any other government agency.

My cousin recently wrote to me and said: “I’d like to ask, as an individual, what can I do?  In my small city 4 miles square, there are so many gangs.”

The answer to that question is which battlefield is most important to you? Which issue is closest to your heart? Which problem strikes a chord within and ignites your passion to get involved? Once you decide that, you can either take part in a community focus group or forum (Investigation).  Volunteer at a local nonprofit as a mentor or other place of service (Involvement). You might want to become an annual donor to one of the faith-based or nonprofits working in your particular areas of concern (investment). Finally, you might consider using your speaking or writing talents to attend city council meetings, or write a letter to the newspaper expressing your views and solutions. Believe me the words of voters do carry power with politicians! (Influence)

Now if you’re still not sure about what you can do, let me suggest the following: Community leadership starts in the home. This is why the role of parents and the influence we have on our children is so crucial to perpetuate and preserve any amount of safety we can expect in our neighborhoods. This is what I have chosen as my battlefield and I invite you to join me, along with many other “Parents on a Mission” (POM), as I call them, who are dedicated to their own personal growth in learning the required skills to raise happy, healthy children as the best gang prevention strategy any community can invest in. If you are not a parent, or a parent of small children, then you are the perfect candidate for enrolling in the POM leadership training. If you kids are already teens or older, this leadership training will still help you, as well as, help you to help others.

Join the leadership Movement for Gang Prevention

Finally, as with any community problem, leadership is the key. And, as mentioned earlier, leadership can come from anywhere and anyone in the community willing to invest their ideas, talent, and/or time and resources to ongoing efforts already in place. Or perhaps be part of initiating a new movement of creative solutions. However you decide to get involved, I can assure you that your leadership will make a difference and help improve your community and prevent more children from joining gangs than if you choose not to get involved at all.

If you are interested in learning more about “Parents on a Mission”, and joining me in our leadership movement for gang prevention, please visit:

www.richardrramos.com/gang-prevention

Sincerely,

Richard

Gang Prevention Training Gets Rave Reviews

PARENTS ON A MISSION CONTINUES TO GET RAVE REVIEWS FROM GANG EXPERTS!

“Parents on a Mission” (POM) is the train-the-trainer curriculum I created when I realized I could not continue to effectively prevent youth from joining gangs if they could not go home to a happy, healthy environment.

For years I had been on the front lines “intervening” and working to transform the lives of gang members and potential gang members.  Yet, it seemed like just when we had made progress in the community, a whole new batch of youth would rise up and start the problems all over again.

I was living the story of the village that one day found dead bodies floating down the river and began pulling them out one by one. But, more dead bodies kept coming, and more help was needed. Still more bodies came and soon almost the “whole community” was brought together in an effort to stop the flow of dead bodies. One day, after a lot of hard work and expenditure of community resources, one man suggested, “Why don’t some of us go up-stream and find the source of where these bodies are coming from?”. BINGO! Once they dealt with the root cause, the bodies came to a complete halt.

This exact moment came to me when I began visiting the homes of the gang members I was working with. This going “up stream” revealed to me the root cause of our community problem and thus “Parents on a Mission” was born.

After teaching this gang prevention curriculum on a weekly basis for two straight years, not only did we see the transformation of individual gang members, but whole families as well. That was many years ago.  But as I visit communities all over America today, I see the same root causes and yet, many communities have not figured out they need to go “up stream”. Thus, POM advocates for communities to stop focusing all their resources down stream and put more resources up stream where the root of the problem stems from, namely, the HOME.

POM does not mean to condemn parents for every youth that joins a gang. Nor do we suggest that parents of gang members are bad people. But we do point out the critical role parents have in the nurturing of their children and strongly suggest this as the best practice any community can invest in to prevent children from joining a gang.

The literature tells us that most kids who join gangs, join between the ages of 12 to 15. POM answers this by teaching and equipping parents to maximize what we call – “The Home Field Advantage”.  This speaks to the fact that parents have the advantage of cultivating and nurturing the first 12 years in the life of their child before their “competition” (gang recruitment) ever steps onto their field, so to speak. However, if we assume that all parents know what to do in those vital first 12 years we leave a potential opportunity for the competition to slip through and steal the loyalty of our children to their own “family”. But, if parents are trained and mentored on how to plant, water, nurture and cultivate healthy growth, their children are prepared to face the competition on the school yard and in the neighborhood because their loyalty is not for sale, and already belongs to the “First Family”, which POM teaches is NOT in the White House, but in MY HOUSE!”

This is only one small piece of what you will learn as a POM Certified Trainer. I promise, no, I guarantee, that you will experience the same results that all POM trainees have received OR YOU MONEY BACK!

For information on how to register for the September 2009 POM training visit:

www.RichardRRamos.com

Here’s what recent trainees are saying about POM:

“Parents On a Mission (POM) showed me that parents issues are the same everywhere and that POM provides a foundation and follow-through on those topics which must be addressed by said parents in order for them to become empowered as leaders within their “own” homes and healthy developers of their children in order to develop and sustain a healthier community.”
- Henry Pacheco, Program Manager/Community Specialist, World Vision USP, Herndon, VA

“POM not only educated me in the area of gang prevention, but it has also taught me to be a better parent. I am currently working one-on-one with at-risk youth and I am now challenged to focus on their parents to bring out the best in them so that they may bring out the best in teir children. I am excited to take this information to reach parents as a way of preventing children from joining gangs.”
- Robert Lopez, Youth Mentor, Victory Resource Center, Coachella, CA

“I have been studying gang related issues for the past seven years and have been working with gang members for the past four years. The POM curriculum exceeds a vast majority of other trainings and seminars I have attended. It gets to the root cause of gang issues and prevents further behaviors. It emphasized the importance of a care givers role , which is something many of us have forgotten.”
- Deepa Patel, Gang Intervention Counselor, Multicultural Clinical Center, Northern VA
“Thank you for taking the time and effort to teach the right and culturally appropriate principles for raising and transforming parents and families that prevent new generations of kids from joining gangs.”
- Wilmer Ramirez, Community Advocate, World Vision, USP, Herndon, VA

I’m a prevention specialist with the Kern County Superintendent of Schools working with students who are at-risk for joining gangs, in a gang, or in the Juvenile Justice system. The POM curriculum was the missing component to our gang prevention strategy. Empowering parents to be the number one prevention specialist is the best approach.”
- Sal Arias, Prevention Specialist – Project 180, Bakersfield, CA

“POM taught me that parents are the key to preventing kids from joining gangs. It is the empowering process for parents and a crucial tool for developing a healthy up bringing for children and the community.”
- Julio Chacon, Community Advocate, World Vision, USP, Herndon, VA

What a gang is, why kids join them and how to prevent it is not the mystery we have made it out to be. A gang is a second family, kids join them because their first family is unhealthy, and therein lies the answer for prevention.
But let’s take a look at a couple of quotes on what the “experts” are saying about addressing the gang problem:

“After a quarter century of a multi-billion dollar war on gangs, there are six times as many gangs…Suppression alone…cannot solve this problem.  Law enforcement officials now agree that they cannot arrest their way out of violence crisis…”

- L.A. Advancement project – 2007

“A proven, effective set of prescribed steps for mobilizing communities to address gang problems does not exist.”
(OJJDP – 2009)

Although I completely disagree with OJJDP’s conclusions, the real question is – Why the Insanity? - If law enforcement and national research is telling us what doesn’t work – Why do we continue to do it? And as I travel the country I see this pattern over and over again of communities employing a proven failed strategy.

I suggest it is time for a community “Two Minute Warning”: Like a football game we need to call time out assess where we are at and make sure we have the right strategy and personnel on the field.
Allow me to draw your attention to some overlooked statistics on Gangs:

1. “Law enforcement estimates of nationwide juvenile gang membership suggest that no more than 1% of all youth ages 10-17 are gang members.” (OJJDP 2006)

2.  “The best estimate of general U.S. youth gang prevalence is 5% ever-joined, 2% current gang members…the strongest message in this research is that…most youth – 7 or 8 out of 10 – do not join gangs through adolescence.” (Klein, Maxson – “Street Gang Patterns and Policies” 2006)

These statistics alone lead us to the following conclusions:

• We have approached the problem as if we have been losing
• POM suggest that we approach the problem from a position of winning
• We have poured our resources into community offense
• POM suggests we pour our resources into community defense, and this is done through mentoring and empowering parents, not the community.

For more information on the September 2009 POM Training visit:

www.RichardRRamos.com

In closing, I encourage your community with the following adage: “Don’t just do something, stand there!”

In other words, call “time out”, stop, step back and re-think what we are doing. Is it working?  If not, why not and why continue to invest in what is not giving us a return on our investment?

Imagine the effectiveness of creating “New Rules” for Community-Wide Gang Prevention!

• Imagine a specialized group of people focused on empowering PARENTS.
• Imagine training young adults who have no kids and young parents of young children as a means of perpetuating safe neighborhoods.
• Imagine parents taking responsibility for sending out cooperative, contributing citizens into the community everyday.
• Imagine parents who are not dependent on the schools, police, or pastors to raise respectful, obedient children.
• Imagine…

POM provides you the tool to accomplish all of the above and more.

The question is not how to get rid of gangs because unless we solve the issues that produce them, we are always going to have them.

The question is not why do kids join gangs, but as the data shows, the question is why do most kids NOT join gangs? We suggest that a healthy home is the reason most kids do not join gangs and empowering more parents is the best strategy that any community can invest in for gang prevention.

POM Definition of Gang Prevention: “Gang prevention is building the capacity of parents to raise happy, healthy, respectful and obedient children whose hearts are not searching to fill the void of unconditional love.”

POM is a low-cost program that gets at the root issues of prevention. It is unique in that it does not teach parents how to fix their kids, but how to fix themselves first through learning and practicing the principles of personal transformation that produces leadership in the home to nurture healthy, happy children which is the key to creating safe neighborhoods.

POM is poised to cooperate with you and the parents in your community to build upon the existing partnerships making gang prevention efforts. Join us in Los Angeles in September.  Visit my website: www.RichardRRamos.com for more information.

Blessings,

Richard

GANG PREVENTION TRAINING

Dear Friends:

As we draw near to the “Parents on a Mission” (POM) Gang Prevention Training in Los Angeles on Saturday, June 27th and Sunday, June 28th, allow me to reach out to you one more time with a special offer that you cannot refuse!

Special Offer – TWO FOR ONE DEAL – SIGN UP AND BRING A COLLEAGUE (or friend) FOR FREE!! Yes, for FREE!
Come on now, is that a deal or is that a deal? (Or maybe I should ask, “deal or no deal?”).

Go Here to SIGN UP NOW!

As you’ve heard, this is unlike most (if not all) of the “gang prevention” trainings out there.  The focus in this training is on empowering parents, rather than the community, as the best prevention strategy any community can invest their time and resources in.  And that is an important distinction to make given the ongoing investment in suppression and intervention practices being made around the country.  But prevention is different. It is not intervention after the fact. It is a pro-active approach to keep kids from ever going down the path of joining a gang.

However, to accomplish true prevention it will take parents. Parents are the primary gate keepers of raising happy, healthy children-with the rest of the community supporting the role and authority of parents, not replacing it.

Many claim it “takes a village” to raise a child. POM says it does not take a village, but only one family and good parenting to raise a child.  Yes, police, probation, parks, pools and community programs are helpful. Yet, they can not replace good “old fashioned” respect and obedience to parental authority.

If we are to win this competition with gangs, it will be won inside the home, behind closed doors. If we fail to focus on empowering parents and continue to fail to solve the other social issues that create gangs, the community effort of creating and funding more programs and well intentioned coalitions, will not succeed in reducing gang activity from our neighborhoods.

It’s not that programs don’t work at all, however the problem is we continue to produce more and more candidates for gang recruitment in each generation and it seems as if we are falling further behind and growing a bigger problem – WHY??? – WHAT IS MISSING?

What is missing is the fact that marriages and child rearing are not what they used to be. And as the foundation of human relationships has continued to erode over the past fifty years, (not to mention the growth and influence of graphic movies, music and magazines) more and more children continue to search for validation, meaning and everything else to fill the void in their hearts that yearns for unconditional love.  Am I right or wrong?

Go Here to SIGN UP NOW

So if we want to stop gangs from continuing on and growing generation after generation, doesn’t it make sense to work on the front end, rather than always reacting on the back end? All social group members age, or move on to other things, and depend on “fresh blood” to continue the legacy, don’t they?  So what is the best way to cut off new recruits?  I’ll come back to answer that in a minute, but one thing the last fifty years has taught us is what doesn’t work and that is creating more “social programs”.  A lack of programs has not been the problem, and if it was the answer, we would have solved the gang problem a long time ago.

So here’s what’s happening my friends:

• A minority group (gangs) is causing decision makers at the highest levels of our communities (and nation for that matter), to create whole new entities and rearranging whole budgets to deal with a small group (generally speaking) of individuals.
• Gangs are outperforming public education in recruiting, retaining and reproducing leaders out of our youth.
• Gangs are outperforming parents by winning the loyalty of their children.
• Gangs are generating community enthusiasm for “unity”, better, or on equal footing with other positive social movements.

That’s plenty to chew on, and to be sure, “Parents on a Mission” (POM) was not designed to address all of the above. But rather to address what I consider to be the best way to cut off the community pool of potential gang recruits, and that is to give parents the tools to earn the respect, exercise their authority and be the heroes that win the loyalty of the hearts of their children.  No gang is more enticing than the approval, acceptance and unconditional love of a parent, even in the midst of a gang infested neighborhood. And the statistics bare this out. You will learn all about this and so much more. By the end of the two day training you will be equipped and empowered with real and doable solutions on how to prevent youth from ever desiring to join a gang!

Overview of the POM Curriculum Content:

Session 1: POM Orientation

The orientation serves to introduce participants to the core values and concepts of Parents on a Mission.  In addition, the orientation serves to give parents a brief understanding about gangs and their growing influence throughout the country. However, POM is not a gang awareness curriculum. This session is not designed to give an in-depth teaching on the gang sub-culture of graffiti, hand signs, colors and other information and data usually given by law enforcement presentations.  Should participants desire this kind of knowledge, the instructor can invite a guest law enforcement (or other subject matter expert) instructor to give a presentation. POM is designed to focus on the problems that create gangs, and not on the problems that gangs create.

Session 2: Parental Personal Growth

The purpose of this first lesson is to help parents understand the importance of their own emotional growth and maturity as leaders in their home.  The material guides parents to an inside-out approach to personal growth and how it relates to their ability to nurture the growth and maturity of their children.

Session 3: Parental Authority & Gang Prevention

Parental authority is by far the most overlooked principle to gang prevention.  Because of the importance of this issue, two sessions have been devoted to the topic of parental authority and discipline.  The lesson on parental authority emphasizes why parents must win the battle of child obedience and provides principles for accomplishing this at an early age.  Parents will learn the importance of the “twelve year home field advantage” and how to maximize this vital time frame in preparing our children for dealing with peer pressure in the neighborhood and school campus.

Session 4: Parental Authority & Discipline

Parental authority and the use of discipline is a controversial topic.  Many parents are confused and afraid to exercise their right as the authority figure in the lives of their children.  This session will define the true meaning of discipline and give guiding principles on how to properly exercise parental authority.  This session will also address the controversy over the issue of spanking.  While POM does not advocate the rightness or wrongness of spanking, we do recognize that many parents do choose to spank their children and thus we provide guidance on its proper use vs. the illegality of physical abuse.  While many argue that parents should not spank their children for any reason, POM respects the choice and right of parents to spank, but to do so properly and wisely.  Finally, this lesson will help participants make the crucial link between gang prevention and child obedience.

Session 5: Community Building

Citizenship and the instruction of the individual’s role in the family and community is the purpose of session five.  Parents gain insights on the family unit as a microcosm of society and how they guide their children from dependence, to independence, and finally to interdependence as contributing members of their community.  Suggested activities are given to assist parents in how to build community in their home.

Session 6: Trust & Loyalty

One of the key elements of becoming a gang member is the willingness to pledge loyalty to the gang above everything and everyone else.  Because of the youth’s willingness to make this pledge, many families have suffered the agonizing loss of their child to prison or the grave yard.  This begs the question; why would any young boy or girl want to give away their loyalty to a street gang?  This session examines how parents are losing this battle to their competition (Gangs), and provides guidance on how to overcome and win the battle for the trust and loyalty of their children as the best practice for gang prevention that any community can invest in.

Don’t wait – ACT NOW and Enroll in this unique and timely training!

Go Here to SIGN UP NOW

Sincerely,

Richard

P.S. – Don’t forget space is limited and the cut off date to enroll is June 22, 2009.

P.P.S – Remember our special deal offer – If you enroll now you can bring a friend for free! Follow your heart and click below – Our program comes with a 100% guarantee of satisfaction or your money back, no questions asked!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Contact:  Richard R. Ramos

Phone: (661) 326-8845

Cell: (805) 331-0902

Email: Richard@RichardRRamos.com

 

STOPPING GANGS BEFORE THEY START

Leading Authority on Gang Prevention Offers Guide to Parents, Teachers

 

BAKERSFIELD, Calif., August 2008 – Richard Ramos is not interested in finding out why some kids join gangs.  He’d much rather focus on the reasons most kids don’t join gangs.

 

In his new book, Gang Prevention and Schools: The Ultimate Guide for Parents and Teachers on How to Prevent Kids From Joining Gangs, Ramos stresses the difference between gang prevention and gang intervention – the latter of which has been tried for years with little success. Instead of focusing on the problems that gangs create, he turns his attention on the problems that create gangs. 

 

Zeroing in on the crucial importance of the family, Ramos calls his gang prevention strategy “Parents on a Mission”. He wants parents to understand that their power to influence their children is greater than any outside force – whether at school or in the neighborhood.  This hands-on guide empowers parents to raise happy, respectful, obedient children who are not looking to give their loyalty away to a second ‘family’ by joining a gang.

 

Ramos opens his book with statistics that support his claim that the majority of kids do not join gangs.  He also offers evidence showing that conventional methods of gang intervention and law suppression strategies do not work.  In Gang Prevention and Schools: The Ultimate Guide for Parents and Teachers on How to Prevent Kids From Joining Gangs, Ramos presents a new community approach that is not only logical but is realistic in how it redefines the issue and refocuses communities on where to invest their time and resources.

 

“Thank you for highlighting the challenges Latino youth face and underscoring the vision, leadership and strong moral compass that parents can provide for their children.”

– First Lady Laura Bush

 

“I have been attending gang prevention/intervention seminars and presentations for 30 years. Richard’s ‘Parents on a Mission’ presentation is THE BEST I have ever heard or seen.”

– Rich Mendel, Director, Boys and Girls Club of Carpinteria, CA

 

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Richard R. Ramos is widely recognized throughout the United States as an expert on gang prevention.  He is also one of the most sought-after Latino leadership speakers on progressive and effective community leadership.  In March 2005, he was recognized as a national interfaith leader through his induction into Morehouse College’s Martin Luther King Jr. International Chapel’s board of directors. Ramos was recognized by President George Bush for community leadership and service in 2007.

 

NON-FICTION, SOFTCOVER, $16.97 U.S., $20.97 CAN

Gang Prevention and Schools: The Ultimate Guide for Parents and Teachers on How to Prevent Kids From Joining Gangs, by Richard R. Ramos.  Copyright 2008.

Published by Richard R. Ramos, Inc.

Web: www.RichardRRamos.com

Tel: 1-805-331-0902

ISBN-13: 978-0-9814714-0-2

# # #

Parents Are The Best Gang Prevention Strategy

The First Family is not in the White House, it’s in your House

 

As American citizens we have been raised with the concept that the “First Family” refers to the family of the President of the United States, which resides in Washington D.C. in what we refer to as the “White House”.  This is an important honor we give the presiding President and his family as we recognize their leadership, position of authority and convey respect for their family.  Thus, when I say, “the First Family is not in the White House, it’s in your house”, it is in no way intended to disrespect or take anything away from the honor of the office of our President.  Rather, it is an attempt on my part to use this well known metaphor to catch the attention of parents and drive home a message about the importance of their role in raising their kids as the best means of preventing them from joining gangs.

 

To illustrate the importance of the role of parents, I am reminded of a conversation I had one day as I was attending the birthday party of one of my church members’ children.  The Grandfather of the child was there and as we were sitting together, we had the following exchange:

 

“Richard, I want to ask you a question.  A lot of kids in this community listen to you and with all the problems we are having with gangs and violence and these kinds of kids, why don’t you get them all together and talk to them?”  I replied, “Well that would certainly be helpful and I have and will continue to do that.  But, I don’t think that is really the best way to handle this situation”.  He looked at me somewhat puzzled and said, “What do you mean?”  I replied, “Well, since you are a gardener by profession; let me put it to you in a way that I know you will understand.  If you walked by your neighbors garden and saw that the flowers were all wilted, dry and dying, who would you rather talk to, the flowers or the gardener?”  With that a smile broke out on his face and in Spanish he told me that I was right and had a made a good point that he really had not considered before.  I explained to him that our children were like the flowers in our garden and the parents were like the gardeners, and if we really wanted to make the best and most effective prevention impact, it would be the work done with “gardeners”, more than just the “flowers”.  Thus, the first hand experience I have gained throughout my 25 plus years of working with gang members and at-risk Latino youth & families has lead me to the conclusion that parent-child relationships are the key to prevention.  This may seem too simple and obvious, but as I continue to examine and study these problems and talk with those involved in gangs or considered “at-risk” for joining a gang, it usually comes right down to the parent-child relationship, or lack thereof, that is at the root of these problems.   

 

I realize this point of view puts a lot of pressure on parents and lays much of the carcass of blame at their feet, and although I do not believe the parents are always to blame for every child who goes astray, I do think that if we parents are willing to take part of the credit for the success of our children, we ought to be just as willing to accept part of the blame when our children fail.  This does not mean that the parent is a bad person, negligent, or abusive.  But what I have found is many parents have simply never really learned many of the things I discuss and teach in my book and gang prevention curriculum, Parents on a Mission.  Those who have learned these things and practice them, in most cases, have healthy relationships with their kids who are leading productive lives. 

 

All of us have the same needs to be accepted as we are, loved for who we are, and given attention, dignity, respect, and self-worth.  We all have a need for the emotional, intellectual, social and spiritual parts of our lives being nurtured and built up to their inherent potential.  I suggest it is this fundamental understanding that is often overlooked when looking for solutions for children and teens that are joining neighborhood street gangs.  Contrary to popular belief, kids want to respect their parents and live in a healthy, happy relationship with them.  But almost all of the gang members I have talked with did not have it and were really broken hearted about it.  It became the hole in their hearts that they have tried to fill with gangs, drugs, alcohol, sex and other negative stuff that just does not fill that hole, no matter how hard and long they have tried to fill it with these other things.  I would even go so far as to say that even “good” kids who are successful in sports, academics, or other socially acceptable things, yet don’t have a healthy, happy relationship with their parents, also have that same hole or emptiness of heart, and nothing, not even “success”, can fill it like the unconditional love and acceptance of a parent.  

Thus, as we continue to search for answers to a number of issues regarding youth that are being heavily influenced by gangs, I suggest that one of the most important messages we can support is encouraging parent leadership in the home. 

 

A number of years ago I was asked by a community group that was organizing a coalition to stop gang violence in South Santa Barbara County, to come and speak at a community forum on the causes of acts of violence by youth.  As we all know, the gang lifestyle, among other things, includes acts of violence.  In fact, the initiation for gang membership is an act of violence called getting “jumped in”, which is a short period of time (usually lasting a minute or two, or more in some cases) where a number of members of the gang beat up on the new member as a way of showing their toughness and desire to be a part of the gang.  That in itself is bad enough, but as we know, the violence does not stop there.  Thus, as I prepared for my talk, I began to think deeply and draw upon all the knowledge and insight I had gained from listening to so many gang members tell me their story and their reasons for doing the things they were doing..  What I eventually came up with to share that day, has become a foundational theme I speak on every chance I get in my desire to help families and communities address the root issues of gangs and youth violence.  The following is the thought I shared that day:  

 

“Acts of violence are caused by an angry heart and an angry heart is produced by unresolved injustices (real or perceived) that young people experienced as victims usually in their own homes.”

 

These “unresolved injustices” can range from sexual, physical, verbal and emotional abuse suffered from any number of family members in the privacy of the home.  My goal in writing to parents (and those who work with parents) is to inspire us to take a moment to look inside our own hearts and be honest about any injustices we may have been a part of, and then provide instruction on how to turn our hearts towards our children, and find the strength to deal with these unresolved issues that our children may have been carrying in their hearts for years.  I know this is not easy and can be very uncomfortable, but if we can find the courage or professional help to take this loving action, I know it will make a great difference in preventing kids from joining gangs, and/or successfully intervening to cause our kids already in a gang to quit and leave the gang more than any other single factor!  I know this to be true because I have done it with my own kids and so many other youth have told me it is true, over and over again in Juvenile Hall cells, prison cells, letters, school class rooms, counseling sessions, and various other public and private settings.   Thus, the single best thing any community can invest in to prevent kids from joining gangs is building up and empowering the parents in the community.

 

A New Year – A New You!

So what about our leadership and New Year’s resolutions?  The new year is always a great time to start, but the issue is always finishing, accomplishing and celebrating the achievement of our goals and dreams (You still do dream don’t you?).  As leaders, ”finishing” is an important aspect of our influence.  It says a lot about our character without us having to say a word.  That is the power of finishing.  We say what we mean, mean what we say and back it up by doing and finishing what we said we would do.  That’s influence, that’s leadership whether at home or work.  

However, sometimes we just don’t quite get there and at that moment we have a choice to make.  We can make excuses and blame others or our “circumstances” for why we didn’t finish.  We can get down on ourselves and allow negative thinking to cause us to quit.  Or, we can be leaders and choose what leaders do when they fail…get back up, learn from the experience, make the adjustments and KEEP ON GOING after our dreams!!!  It’s kind of like when I was playing high school basketball, dribbling the ball down the court all by myself for an easy, uncontested lay up to win the game.  The crowd was excited, the anticipation grew, the noise got louder as I went up and….missed the shot!  Ohhhhhhhhh…went the crowd in disappointment and disbelief that I could not finish such an easy shot.  Can you imagine how I felt…never mind, I don’t want you or me to know and remember how I felt at that moment. 

Since that time, I have had many other victories and failures but the key is I never chose to let that moment define who I was.  Oh it has been a battle…a battle of the mind.  To learn how to control my thought life and reject the loser mentality, fear of failure, and temptation to never try anything new that would take me out of my comfort zone and do anything that I was unfamiliar with or that required trusting others to show me a new way.   

You see, failure has a way of leaving its mark on your sub-conscious mind.  It kind of numbs you and leaves you “gun shy” to put yourself out there again.  And if you let it, it will control your life and keep you “existing” but deny you “thriving” and soaring to the heights you were created to explore and excel in.  Thoughts like – “I’ll never do that again” or “I knew better than to think I could achieve that goal” or “I’m just not like other people that seem to get all the breaks”. - But I can hear some of you saying, “That could be a good thing Richard, to avoid putting myself in a bad or dangerous situation again” – Your’e right…BUT I’M NOT TALKING ABOUT THAT “DUDE” (sorry girls – although in California girls call each other dude too…go figure).  I’m talking about LEADERSHIP…INFLUENCE…VICTORY…GROWTH and SIGNIFICANCE. 

The fact is we are out front and our life is in the fishbowl and nothing inspires others who are watching us more than to watch us overcome failure, hardship and disappointment.  Leadership is not about us…you know that…it is about the path we are helping others along in finding their voice and taking them to another level of their potential.  And why do they believe they can grow, achieve more, win and thrive in life???? – Not because we leaders are perfect, but rather because sometimes we fail…hey, we are normal people too! But the difference is that we don’t let our failures define our character and therefore we never quit!  So they look at us and say to themselves – “Shoot, if he can do it, so can I”.  Ordinary people can do extraordinary things and thus the challenge below. Our theme for this year is  – BE GREAT IN 2008!!! -

Remember, “good is the enemy of best”, so we are not talking about just being ”good enough”…we are talking GREAT…”isn’t good, good enough?” NO (You asked me).  So where do we start? Too many people think you have to have a title to be a leader, or own a company or get elected to office or be the Boss at work.  Not so.  You can lead right from where you are at home, work or business.  It starts by leading yourself, making small promises to yourself and following through; FINISHING.  Then watch how your influence-leadership will grow with your kids, spouse, co-workers, boss and community.  

Be Great in 2008!

“One of the reasons people don’t achieve their dreams is that they desire to change their results without changing their thinking” – Source unknown 

As we look to a new year, I want to set forth a challenge to Latino leaders.  I am sure most of you are familiar with Dr. Stephen R. Covey’s new book on, The 8th Habit – from effectiveness to greatness and the book by Jim Collins, From Good to Great.  Both of these works speak to the challenge I am issuing here, which is that we strive for greatness and exceed our past accomplishments and become “great in 2008”!  For Latino’s, so much is taking place on so many levels at once and I believe we need that extra something to rise to the challenge of great leadership for the coming year.   However, sometimes as we decide to “go for it”, we are suddenly met with that little voice inside our head, a “voice” from the past, as I call it, that can cause us Hispanics to hang ourselves in leadership if we are not cognizant of the enemy of negativity that causes all kinds of wrong thinking to keep us from realizing our true destiny.   

I offer the following as three common challenges to be overcome on our path to greatness:   

1. Fear of Failure 

I have known so many Latino people who had the all the talent and ability of any other great leader, except for one thing.  They did not have the capacity to overcome the fear of failure.  Somehow they had a deep seeded non-belief in themselves for the long term.  In other words, they could achieve great things today and possibly tomorrow, but could not believe they could keep it up day after day, year after year as a normal part of their life.  There thoughts and words were filled with self-doubt, “what if’”, “maybe”, “but”, “coulda”, “shoulda”, “woulda” and all the other excuses we make to talk ourselves out of greatness.  I know because I went through this internal, mental battle for years before I learned how to re-new my mind and accept who I really was and the purpose I was on this planet to achieve.   I remember as a young boy my father would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I said, “a professional baseball player”.  What he said next, and repeatedly said to me, stuck with me for many years, “Well, are you good enough?  You have to be the best to play in the major leagues.  Do you really think you are that good?”  Then he said, “If you don’t have such big hopes and dreams, you won’t be so disappointed when you don’t achieve them.”  It has only been over the past several years that I have come to realize the impact those words had on my sub-conscious mind and helped to sabotage my abilities and live in the fear of failure for too long.  Whether it is a cultural thing, or not, all I know is there are many Latino’s who hear these kinds of put downs, doubts, fears and belittling comments that mentally handicap us and cause us not to dream big or believe we have what it takes to “play in the major leagues”.   I don’t mean to say that all Latino’s go through this, or to stereo type our culture.  I can only speak to what I have lived and witnessed in so many of my family members, friends and associates.  Be that as it may, what I am saying here to all who know what I am talking about is that it is not true!  You have what it takes to be great!!! This book is your call to action!  In the last chapter I am going to show five simple steps of how you can get out of the old mind set, re-new your mind, and live in your full potential!  

2. Pride 

Nothing blinds a leader more than pride.  There is a healthy pride and an unhealthy pride.  The latter is what I am speaking to here that can be defined as conceit or arrogance.  Pride blinds us to the truth of the situation, causes our focus to be fuzzy, our hearing to go deaf.  It clogs clear and accurate thinking and decision making, but worst of all, it blinds us to ourselves.  Hardly anything is worse for a leader than to be blind to what everybody else knows about you; you are impatient, short fuse, loud, over bearing, not a good listener, opinionated, stubborn, incompetent, self-serving, etc., all weaknesses that none of us are above, but all weaknesses a leader should be aware of and work to improve.  What would keep us from doing so? PRIDE.  Pride does not improve, does not accept constructive criticism, does not seek coaching and therefore pride can stump our personal and professional growth through isolation, a major mistake for a leader.  Great leaders can not afford to be influenced with the poison of pride that causes one to become stagnant, irrelevant and stuck in methodologies and missions that may have worked in the past, but are not working today and pride is the one thing keeping you from recognizing why everybody else has moved on.  

3. Jealousy 

Jealousy is insecurity in not knowing who you really are.  Insecurity is probably one of the major things that hinder Latinos from achieving like we were meant to achieve simply because we do not possess the self confidence to believe in ourselves for big things in a big way for a big purpose.  In my experience, this seems to be at the root of why many Latino leaders see other Latino leaders as their competition, or as a threat of some kind, rather than viewing them as colleagues to be embraced for what the positive contribution they are making amongst our people.  Thus, when we see others who are accomplishing more than us in a big way, we don’t have the capacity to handle it and we tend to attack or criticize them in one way or another.  The mistake we make here keeps us from achieving the kind of status and influence we could have as a “community in unity”.  But I believe this is beginning to happen as we grow as a people and recognize each others unique contribution to the whole. Security, self-assurance, and self confidence comes from understanding that we are created in the image of God and that alone is our endorsement for being here and seals the inner security and significance of our life on earth.  Understanding this one fact frees us from having to compete with others and frees us to be genuinely happy for the successes of others that might be bigger or faster, taller, or better equipped to handle things we were not meant to handle.  However, there uniqueness takes nothing away from my uniqueness but instead adds to who I am and therefore increases our capacity to learn more, do more and serve more for the common good.  We can appreciate the different skills and talents we all were endowed with from birth that makes us a significant part of the Master builders’ tapestry of diversity that he obviously loves so much. Can you imagine how boring it would be if we were all the same?  If we all lived in the same place, ate the same food, looked the same, dressed the same, talked and walked the same and everything about our lives was the same?  No thank you.  I admire the differences I see in others and I have learned to appreciate each individual’s uniqueness that is different from me, yet, just as needed for the fullness of our humanity.  Jealousy is overcome through each of us discovering our unique value to God and ourselves and learning that our security and significance comes from within and not from without.   

Thoughts for the Holidays

The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning Commentary. It was sent to me by a friend and I thought it would make a good “guest blogger” piece as we approach the Holiday season.

My confession:

I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish.  And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees Christmas trees. I don’t feel threatened. I don’t feel discriminated against. That’s what they are:  Christmas trees.It doesn’t bother me a bit when people say, “Merry Christmas” to me. I don’t think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it.

It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year. It doesn’t bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu. If people want a crescent it’s just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.I don’t like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don’t think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period.

I have no idea where the concept came from that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can’t find it in the Constitution and I don’t like it being shoved down my throat.Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship Nick and Jessica and we aren’t allowed to worship God as we understand Him?   I guess that’s a sign that I’m getting old, too.  But there are a lot of us who are wondering where Nick and Je ssica came from and where the America we knew went to.

In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it’s not funny, it’s intended to get you thinking. Billy Graham’s daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her “How could God let something like this happen?” (regarding Katrina) Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response.  She said, “I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are,but for years we’ve been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives.  And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out. How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?”

In light of recent events…terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O’Hare (she was murdered, her body found recently) complained she didn’t want prayer in our schools, and we said OK.

Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school. The Bible says thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself. And we said OK.Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn’t spank our children when the y misbehave because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock’s son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he’s talking about. And we said OK. Now we’re asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don’t know right from wrong, and why it doesn’t bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.

Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out. I think it has a great deal to do with “WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.”

Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world’s going to hell.   Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says.  Funny how you can send ‘jokes’ through e-mail and they spread like wildfire but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing.  Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.

Are you laughing?

Funny how when you forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you’re not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it.

Funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us.

Pass it on if you think it has merit. If not then just discard it… no one will know you did. But, if you discard this thought process, don’t sit back and complain about what bad shape the world is in.  My Best Regards.
Honestly and respectfully,

Ben Stein
 

The New Latino Leadership – Voting

Let me be the first to admit that over the years of my adult life I have neglected to exercise my right and privilege to vote as a citizen of the United States of America.  As a matter of fact, when I really think about it, most of the family and friends I have spent most of my life with (even up to the present time) did not vote and if they did, it was never encouraged, made a priority or even discussed.  I am not saying I have never voted, but I have not been consistent.  The first time I registered to vote was in college when the campus MEChA club conducted a voter drive way back in 1974.  I registered under the “La Raza Unida” party (does anyone out there remember those days?).  Sometime later (during the late 80’s or early 90’s I forget which now), I registered as a Republican as I felt at the time the party was more in line with my Christian moral values.  However, over the years since then, I have grown in my knowledge and understanding of both major political parties, have carefully followed Congress as a whole and at this point I am registered as an Independent.  Why? – Well, if you will indulge me for a brief editorial, I will candidly share my thoughts. 

I must say that I do agree with the “spirit” of what James Dobson is doing because, in my opinion as a Christian first and a Latino second, neither the Republicans nor Democrats deserve my support.  For those who do not know what I am referring to, Dr. James Dobson, Founder of “Focus on the Family”, and known for his conservative Republican views, recently announced that he would consider supporting a third option candidate. 

“In a surprising move Dr. James Dobson of Focus on the Family announced in an op-ed in the New York Times that he and some 50 colleagues met and discussed what position they would take in the upcoming Presidential race. According to a report on Fox news October 9, 2007 Dobson said “If neither of the two major political parties nominates an individual who pledges himself or herself to the sanctity of human life, we will join others in voting for a minor party candidate”…No less than three times in his interview with Dr. Dobson on October 9, Sean Hannity disclosed to Dr. Dobson the dreadful result of a completed “Rasmussen poll” which clearly indicated that any split in the vote for the top front runners would result in a landslide victory for Sen. Hillary Clinton.Dr. Dobson’s reply to Hannity was obviously labored and he repeated several times that his decision was based on “principle.” …Unfortunately he can only make these decisions for himself and not for Focus on the Family because non-profits cannot endorse political candidates.” (www.americanchronical.com)  

Again, I say I agree with the “spirit” of this action, which is to say that I do not necessarily line up with every view of Dr. Dobson on every issue we are faced with as a country, but I do respect the “principle” of being LOYAL TO CONSCIENCE above being loyal to political parties.  This is a principle I suggest we Latinos need to consider as we think about our political affiliations.  When Latinos ask me which party they should register and vote as, my answer is; how we register is not as important as how we vote.  In my view, we must vote our conscience, our convictions, what is right for our community as a whole and no longer allow our vote to be taken for granted by any politician or political party.   I know there have been efforts in the past at trying to establish a viable third party, but it has not been successful, Ross Perot and Ralph Nader being the last ones to come close.  Nevertheless, I think it is definitely needed and at the very least sends the right message that we are discouraged, disgusted and distrustful of Government as it now stands and has performed over the past several years.   

Secondly, for Latinos we are at a crossroads.  We can just give in and vote for a default candidate and hope for the best, or give our support to a third party that we know won’t win this time, live with whoever does win, and continue to build for the future of building our voter base and show up to the next major election “buffed out” as a force that has gone from a small voice to a loud undeniable SHOUT!  Thus, I suggest for Latinos today, that we get behind issues, our issues, and make it clear that our vote will be tied to the candidate that lines up and delivers on our issues, regardless of political party. 

Thirdly, the issue of improving the Latino vote, in my mind, comes down to Latino leadership.  We find ourselves in a new position as the largest minority people group in the country, a potential buying power estimated at $1 trillion dollars, and the possibility of being the nations swing vote to decide many elections locally, state and nationwide.  The question is not can we lead, but rather will we lead?  Because the truth is; if we have the numbers but not the power, who cares? The problem is that historically, Hispanics/Latinos don’t vote and it’s going to take real leadership from you and me to change that, otherwise, we will remain where we have always been when it comes to American politics and power – ON THE MARGINS.  My goal in raising this issue with you is to mobilize our voting efforts and begin a movement that will take us from the MARGINS to the MAINSTREAM of American influence! 

None of the major political candidates will take us serious until they see that we VOTE.  We can protest, boycott, rally in the streets and make all the noise we want, but until we VOTE, we won’t be heard.   Have you ever asked yourself why so much emphasis, time and money is put into small states like Iowa and New Hampshire?  Simple, they have a history of active voters as a state.  Let me ask the reverse question; why is California, the nation’s most populous state with the most electoral votes for President, not given much attention? Simple, the majority of people in the state don’t vote and California is taken for granted as a “Democrat” state.  The point is, can you imagine what would happen in American politics if our people simply voted?  In my view, until we see that Presidential candidates are more interested in the Latino vote in California, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada, and Florida, etc., rather than places like Iowa and New Hampshire, we will never get off the margins and into the mainstream of influence and power because it is the “American voter” and not the “American people” that wield political clout.   

Finally, voter registration is hard work.  However, if we all work within our circle of influence, I believe our collective effort will be the beginning (or continuation as the case may be) of a Latino voter middle-class-to-grassroots-movement that is long overdue.  For example, I suggest one of the best ways we can mobilize the Latino vote is to engage the faith community.  Every Sunday morning the Priest and Pastor hold the power of the “bully pulpit” where they are heard by hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of parishioners.  Perhaps there can be a concerted effort at strategic times in the year to address Latino issues and if nothing else, at least encourage their parishioners to register and exercise their privilege to vote.  This is just one example, but the point is at this time in our nation we need Latino LEADERSHIP and I cannot think of a better place to light a fire under the eligible Latino voters than in God’s house! 

Thus, I strongly recommend the following for all of us to encourage our ministers to consider doing on a regular basis: 

1.    Provide voter registration forms at the church for members to fill out before or after the service

2.    Seek to enlist your church facility (if possible) as a place to vote in the community

3.    Provide members educational material on the issues and from time to time speak to the issues from a scriptural point of view 

Aside from the faith community, many others of us have access to radio, television, news print, schools and other community venues where Latinos can be reached, educated and encouraged to vote.  Thus, as I stated earlier, we are at a crossroads, we need leadership from the margins to the mainstream of civic influence and at least one big step we can take is to make sure we increase the number of Latinos at the polls for the upcoming election in 2008! 

For those who may need more information and/or motivation, below I have summarized for you the latest statistics regarding the 2006 Latino vote that is researched and distributed by the Pew Hispanic Center, which helps to understand and project the need to improve for 2008. (www.pewhispanic.org)    

The Size of the Latino Electorate 

The Pew Hispanic Center estimates that more than 17 million Hispanics will be U.S. citizens over the age of 18 and thus eligible to vote in the November 2006 election, an increase of 7% over the 2004 election. The Hispanic share of the U.S. electorate will increase to 8.6% from 8.2% in 2004.  

Projections based on 2004 voter registration 

These numbers assume that Latinos of different age groups and nativity categories will register at rates seen in 2004. At that election, 9.3 million Latinos, or 58% of eligible voters, were registered, according to the 2004 Current Population Survey. The registration rates for blacks and whites were 69% and 75% respectively. 

·         If Latinos registered at the same rate as 2004, then 10.0 million Latino citizens 18 and older would register to vote in 2006. That would represent 58% of eligible Latinos.

·         If Latinos registered at the same rate as non-Hispanic blacks did in 2004, then 11.5 million Latinos would register to vote in 2006. That would represent 67% of eligible Latinos.

·         If Latinos registered to vote at the same rate as non-Hispanic whites did in 2004, then 12.3 million Latinos would register to vote in 2006. That would represent 71% of eligible Latinos.

·         Latinos historically lag behind whites and blacks in registration (percent among all eligible voters) and voting (percent of registered voters who actually cast ballots).

·         In 2006, the pro-immigration rallies held in many cities raised expectations that political participation among Latinos would also increase.   Census data shows a marginal increase in registration and participation rates among Latinos between 2002 and 2006.

Whites, however, also experienced a slight gain, so Latinos did not close the considerable gap. About 54% of Latino eligible voters registered in 2006, up from 53% in 2002. About 60% of these registered voters said they actually voted in 2006, up from 58% in 2002. By contrast, 71% of white eligible voters registered in 2006, two percentage points higher than in 2002. About 72% of these registered voters said they voted in last year’s mid-term elections, one percentage point higher than in 2002.

The shares of blacks who registered and voted declined from 2002 to 2006. Registration rates decreased by two percentage points, to 61%, and voting by one percentage point, to 67%. The combination of demographic factors and participation rates meant that 13% of the total Latino population voted in 2006, compared with 39% of all whites and 27% of all blacks.  

·         The Hispanic population grew by 5.7 million between November 2002 and November 2006, the time period that frames the two elections.

·         Hispanics accounted for nearly half of the total population growth.

·         A majority of these new Latinos were not eligible to vote. More than a third were under 18 years of age and another third were adult non-citizens. About 30% were eligible to vote. Whites, by contrast, accounted for 24% of the population growth between 2002 and 2006 but 46% of the growth in the voting eligible population. Among whites, the number under 18 and the number who were not citizens also declined during this period. As a result, the increase in the number of white eligible voters (3.9 million) exceeded the growth in the white population (2.8 million). 

Going to the Polls

·         Hispanics accounted for 5.8% of the votes cast in 2006, up from 5.3% vote in 2002. In absolute numbers, an additional 800,000 Hispanics cast ballots in the 2006 election compared with the 2002 election.

·         Whites accounted for 81% of the votes in 2006, unchanged from 2002. In absolute numbers, an additional 5.6 million whites cast ballots in the 2006 election compared with the 2002 election.

·         Blacks accounted for 10% of the votes in 2006, down from about 11% in 2002. The black vote increased by 400,000 in 2006.

·         The 5.6 million votes cast by Hispanics in 2006 represented 13% of the total Hispanic population. The 9.9 million votes cast by black represented 27% of the black population and the 78 million votes cast by whites represented 39% of the white population.

·         The Latino electorate was a much smaller share of the Latino population than it was among whites and blacks. In November 2006, 39% of Hispanics were eligible to vote compared to 76% of whites and 65% of blacks. 

Participation Rates  

·         Hispanics who are eligible to vote are less likely to register and less likely to cast a vote than either whites or blacks.

·         About 54% of Hispanics who were eligible to vote registered in November 2006. Among whites and blacks, the figure was 71% and 61%, respectively. Registration rates increased slightly among Hispanics and whites between the two elections but decreased among blacks.

·         Latinos who registered to vote were less likely to vote in November 2006 than whites and blacks who were registered.

·         The turnout among Latinos increased slightly from 2002 to 2006, as it did among whites. Among blacks, however, the turnout decreased by one percentage point between the two elections (68% in 2002 and 67% in 2006).

Gang Prevention Guidelines for Parents

Balancing Authority with Humility 

1. Decide that a good relationship is more important than being “right”. 

As parents we must set the example of humility to our kids.  We need to be willing to re-think what we have done.  The words we used, the way we reacted to a difficult situation.  Even after we re- think it all, we may still conclude that we were “right”.  But this is not enough, or the important point, because our child has not accepted our position and is obviously upset about something.  At this point many parents take the attitude of “too bad, they will just have to get over it”.  But oftentimes they don’t.  Instead they harbor resentment and begin to disrespect us as “adults”.  Not because they think they are always right, but because we do.  Usually, kids know when they are in the wrong, but what they are reacting to is our disrespect for their views and a valuing of their development process as teenagers.  After all, didn’t most of us make the same mistakes we are now upset about, that they have repeated?  Does that have something to do with our negative, intolerant reaction?  Are we more concerned with our image as parents with others, than we are with the natural growth process of our children?  Isn’t the more important issue the fact that our child is not happy with how we have handled their mistakes?  What are we going to do with that?  At this juncture, I suggest that we need to think beyond who is right or wrong, and consider if there was not a better way to handle the situation that will allow our kids to maintain their sense of self- respect, without side stepping the issue of wrong behavior.

Maybe we need to go back and listen a little more to their side of things and make them feel understood, even if we don’t agree.  All of this is done because we want to have a good relationship and maintain our role as the prime authority figures in their lives.  My experience tells me that most kids will respond to this type of exercising our authority and they will respect us for our humility, fairness and willingness to hear them out. The bottom line is that the clear message we are sending them is that we value them as individuals and want a healthy and meaningful relationship with them that goes beyond just always having to be right.

 

 2. Admit when you are wrong and apologize 

     After practicing the “art of listening”, both with my own kids and those I have worked with over the years, I discovered that I was often wrong in my thoughts, words and deeds, plain and simple, no excuses or explanations.  It usually was a result of jumping to conclusions and/or reacting out of anger.  I discovered I was wrong in two ways. First, my conscience was bothering me in the way I had handled the situation.  Second, I went back under more control of my anger and listened.  As my kids would tearfully explain how they felt and explained their reasoning and views, only my pride would keep me from admitting to myself, and to them, that I was in the wrong.  Usually my error was in the way I handled the situation, and sometimes in my judgment of the situation, yet both called for the humility to say that I was wrong, apologize and ask for forgiveness.

I recall one time after my three oldest kids (Five in all) had become teenagers that I needed to apologize for some of the mistakes I had made with them as I was in a time of personal growth and could see that they were beginning to resent the way their younger siblings were benefiting from it.  I was more patient, understanding, lenient and flexible.  I had a short meeting with them and started to share my heart and apologize for what they had to experience with a younger and less experienced father.  I know I was not abusive, but overly strict and intolerant in ways that I knew had probably bruised their hearts in some ways.  As I turned to my oldest son (Who is my step-son, but who I have raised since he was two years old) and apologized for disciplining him too harshly at times, he begin to break down and cry.  Until that moment I had not really realized how much I had bruised his heart and he obviously had been carrying this in his heart.  I could feel and see that a healing was taking place in his heart towards me and all I could do was hug him and cry and apologize.  Up to that time, we had a good relationship, but after that I know it was deepened and better than ever before and remains so today.

I cannot remember a time that this sincere humility I have demonstrated to either gang members I was working with or with my own children, was rejected and did not elicit the same admission from them of their wrong and the offering of an apology. When children witness authority figures admit to their mistakes and apologize for them, it goes along way in establishing a respect for you and ultimately your authority.

 

  3. Be Flexible, Fair and Firm 

The ability of parents to be flexible in exercising their authority gives them a lot of credibility and favor with their growing children.  It symbolizes that you recognize they are growing up, are willing to bend the rules as a form of allowing them to earn trust and demonstrates that you understand that the “spirit” of the law is more important than the “letter” of the law.  What has helped me with this aspect is to know the difference between mistakes or accidents and defiance or willful disobedience.  As parents sometimes we can be guilty of “choking on the ant, but swallowing the Camel”.  In other words, we make the little things big things and the big things little.  And for some reason, kids are very tuned in to this kind of unfairness or injustice and have a keen sense of what is a mountain and what is a mole hill.  This is why it is a good practice to include your kids (10 years and older) in deciding what the consequences are for both good and bad behavior.  A lot of times I was pleasantly surprised at the punishment they deemed for themselves as I was not going to be as strict as they were on themselves.  But, we agreed to their terms and they were respectful of “our” decision.  I think the key here is that kids know that you have the final word, yet you are allowing them to judge themselves and this is where you can gain respect, earn loyalty and create emotional bonds that pay big dividends later on down the road when it counts.  There are times when one must be firm, and there are times when mercy and grace are called for and the wise parent will learn when to exercise them in a timely manner.  This takes perception, insight, knowledge, and experience but it also requires the ability to listen to your kids to learn how to discern different situations.  Through being flexible, fair and firm we open up the opportunities to develop character, increase the level of the relationship and cease moments for a lesson in leadership and the proper use of authority.